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Billet-Deux

Good day esteemed quarantine questors, another riveting lockdown edition from your 5th least favourite cometry hocker. Thanks for voting. An entertaining composition today, for me anyway. This piece has lived in the file since the summer as initially it was an embarrassing catharsis, not the pithy mirth of its current […]

Is Anybody Doubt There?

Greetings sharks and minnows, thank you for bellying up to my chump-rhyme chum line. We’re gonna need a bigger moat. It’s my understanding we know more about our moon and adjacent planets than about the mindboggling depths of our own oceans. In the end perhaps that’s unsurprising, everyone looks up […]

Stairway To Leaven

Good day friends and whoever else. Apologies it’s taken me so long to waste more of your time. My amateur’s badger wrestling wrangler conglomerate is going, as expected, very poorly. The badgers can’t seem to grasp the finer points of blade work, let alone the graceful nuance of the sabre […]

Sympatric Swayze

And he said unto us, “Hark! Could the owner of the blue 1993 Chevrolet Cavalier please contact reception? Your lights are on”. Good morning, all creatures great and small! I’m annoyingly pressed for time today so let’s just proceed directly past the inane and proceed to adding in the requisite […]

Squeaky Zeal Gets the Fleece

Good morning, dear friends, cursed enemies and the benignly ambivalent, please make yourselves at home. Where you presumably already are. What does a frisky snake say to their potential lover in order to woo them? While seductively caressing their perched upon surface, “hey baby, come sliiiither”. Damn that’s hot. Well […]