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Petit Poisson

Did you know that a microfiche is an antiquated method of aggregating information, often newspapers, and is in actuality not a very small fish pronounced by someone of Swedish descent? 10 -year old me was fairly devastated to learn this on a library tour. In fact, they had no fiche […]

The Final Countdown

Good morrow fair peasants and pheasants! Let’s avoid being hunted by the wealthy for sport momentarily and take in a picture together. I have an important query, why do spaceships in movies ALWAYS have built-in self destruct sequences? When would this ever be considered practical? I’ll accept potentially dangerous scientific […]

“The Chosen Whites”

I’ve always found the terms over and underwhelmed both over and underwhelming. It’s curiously redundant how each can be made to mean either good or bad. Beyond which, why must the whelming process be so polarized? Can one not merely be whelmed? If I were, would that even mean anything? […]

Billet-Deux

Good day esteemed quarantine questors, another riveting lockdown edition from your 5th least favourite cometry hocker. Thanks for voting. An entertaining composition today, for me anyway. This piece has lived in the file since the summer as initially it was an embarrassing catharsis, not the pithy mirth of its current […]

Stairway To Leaven

Good day friends and whoever else. Apologies it’s taken me so long to waste more of your time. My amateur’s badger wrestling wrangler conglomerate is going, as expected, very poorly. The badgers can’t seem to grasp the finer points of blade work, let alone the graceful nuance of the sabre […]